Pat, Vanna and better prizes for all

I’m not a big television watcher. If I have time on my hands I generally prefer to read or do crossword and Sudoku puzzles. I don’t ignore the tube completely and like most of us have probably watched more during the pandemic. But with the Gazette, Globe and Mail, and National Post all giving up on anyone who doesn’t live in the big city - I know, I know, I can get them all on line - I have tended to get more of my news from CBC, CTV, Global and CNN.

One of my secret vices in all this is that I am also a big fan of both Jeopardy and Wheel of Fortune.

With Jeopardy I can match wits and recall-speed with some very impressive contestants. It’s just as well that I do it from the safety of my own home since, although I know a lot of the answers, my reaction time is somewhere between that of a snail and a three-toed sloth. I also miss Alex Trebek.

Wheel of Fortune is also fun to watch with host Pat Sajak, arguably the wittiest host on television. The game itself is much like a giant electronic crossword puzzle; the difference being there are two other people racing to fill in the blanks at the same time.

On both of the aforementioned shows contestants can also win a lot of money and on Wheel they also throw in a variety of prizes including vacation trips, fashion accessories, a car, an occasional free home and rarely, very rarely $1,000,000.

Now, far be it for me to criticize a franchise that has entertained people world wide for thirty some odd years but the Wheel needs some new prizes. A vacation cruise with 5,000 other fun seekers could be nice but in this pandemic age probably something most people would be leery about taking. A flight to a vacation paradise is also a dream but getting on and off the flight a nightmare.

So here are a few suggestions that perhaps better suit these difficult times.

Top of the list would be winning a coupon for 1,000 litres of gasoline from a retailer of your choice. I realize this wouldn’t be a big win for anyone with an electric vehicle but they could always sell off the coupon to the owner of a Ford 150 or a Dodge Ram at any price below the going rate.

Then there’s what I’ll call the Head of the Line Airport Pass. Win this nifty item and you go directly to the head of the check-in line at any airport in the world. While we’re at it Wheel contestants could also spin and win a brand new passport guaranteed to arrive within six months. It might not be as flashy as a new car but it beats the present wait-time.

If travel is not your thing, why not spin and win a free hip or knee replacement at the hospital of your choice provided to you within thirty days. Better still, as a sort of grand prize, spin and win a family doctor for life. That trumps just about any of the Wheel’s existing prizes except for the million bucks and even then I’m not too sure.

No, the Wheel of Fortune prize list definitely needs to change with the times, even if a spin gets you a year’s supply of chicken, beef and pork instead of a week in Costa Rica.